What's a migraine??

Or better yet a headache. Yah count me out from some of the few in the world that don't get headaches. I rarely if ever get them. If I can remember clearly, the only headache I do remember is/are the ones I get from a head cold, which is generally ALWAYS the type of cold I get. But overall, headaches don't run in my family at all. Don't know of any of my siblings having headaches; don't know of my parents having it...Don't know of myself having it.

If ever I've had any other type of headache..it's been the type you get from eating too much pasta or something. I'm sure some of you may know what I'm talking about....

err that's it..reading papers in office. Still gotta work in lab..haven't had time :(

Read me out!!!!!

I saw a cool quiz on my friend Sasha's website. Had to try it out myself..my results are as follows. Read on and take it yourself..I wanna know about all of you. For all you non-blogsters, e-mail me the results ;)

Anostica took the free ColorQuiz.com personality test! "Seeks freedom from problems and a secure state of ..." Click here to read the rest of the results.

Yep another example of my handwriting. This was written in the early morning hours....sorta shows the relaxed version of my writing.
Anostica

So I've been studying quite a bit for the last few days for an exam. Today while studying I was bored and took a pic of my notes. Figured I'd put it up. I'm always intrigued by how everyone writes, as I totally do believe handwriting says a lot about a person. In fact my handwriting changes a bit depending on my mood.
Anostica

Studying be a bitch..

Yep yep..test is tomorrow for my one and ONLY class I'm taking. Took the day off from lab, though I did go. I just left a note in lab saying I was in the library most of the day..and I was. Stayed there from 12-8 p.m. Now I"m back at it. Tons of studying still to do. Just gulped down my cup of cappachino. Didnt think I'd need it till I was feeling a bit sleepy and tired already!

Class is intense. It's a mix of mostly quantum mechanics, physics, and chemistry, with a touch of biology. As a biologist, I'm finding it quite fun to study for. I should be into molecular biology, but for some reason studying for molecular biology freaks me out more than this does. This stuff at least makes more sense to me, and I'm not to anxious or worried (yet).

Test be at 7:00 p.m. tomorrow. I've already decided to treat myself to a nice day of shopping and eating out (my roommate wants to!!), if I study hard for the test. If not, I shall be punishhheeeed.

Study break be up...back to work. Yes, if you've read this far..Please pray for me to whomever is the great power in your life :)

Shopping be my friend!

So....I've got this huge Biophysics exam coming up on tuesday. Have been planning to study for it..but for some reason it's starting to make sense, so what would a girl like me do? Yah..slack off. Totally not..I'm not the procrastinator type...but being this grad student busy outta her mind it making me into a slackass.

Anyways, woke up today. Figured I'd do the usual, go out with roommate to get groceries..then come home and study. WELL...it's 6:06 p.m...and I've done everything but study. On the way to the grocery store..I told rooommate I really wanted to shop..so we made a detour to T-mall and shopped!! I found some great stuff...only bought makeup and a cuteass shirt. Pinpointed a ton of more stuff...wanted to get it, but was thinking wait till next week and get them...OH, there's like 6 things I sooo want, and I'll be there getting them next week. It was the test on the back of my mind holding me back from spending my whole time at the mall!!!

so...towards the end of finally yanking myself out of the mall..get a phone call from a friend. Her friend's in town. I must meet her...gotta head off to dinner, then they wanna go out again. I'm not going, I already told her..and I hope she understands, as it's bumming me that she keeps trying to talk me into it. Hopefully sometime tonight, I'll get the groceries done, get my cheesecake bites, exercise, go to lab, and then study some...rrrrrrrr

off...to eat some carbs...just what I need!

I love these thingies! I try to eat one everyday!!
Anostica

The much needed hour

Never realized how important this would become to me. But always, everyday I make it a point to walk home for lunch and spend at least an hour in my apt to myself. I sometimes will call on the phone, but generally just go home and eat and sit and just maybe watch t.v. Err..I try to go around 1ish, that way I can catch Jerry Springer too haha. But I rarely have the energy to watch it all--just usually catch a glimpse of the topic, and maybe see people fight.

Never knew how important it is. I mean I just need that hour to RELAX! My lab members invite me to lunch, and I decline about 98% of the time--only to go home on my own. AT times I do it because I really don't want to eat out; can't imagine eating all unhealthy nasty food. Then also, it's because I'm not too comfy with all of them..but mostly it's because I just need that one hour as a breather!!!

Today I didn't go home...so I'm missing my hour :( My lab members all went out to lunch. I was gonna work in lab..but now that I see the lab is quiet, I took the advantage to come back in the office and just sit in the lab and enjoyyyyy the ahhh quietness.

off to work I guess..lab members will be back from lunch break in a few I guess..

**note I complain cuz my lab is huge. I never get quietness.

Why do I put myself through it??

I don't get it. I choose this, but it's like grinding my frikking teeth on cement. I mean this Phd shit is just isn't working in a lab anymore..neither did I ever think it would be. I knew I'd have to face advisors and have to talk..but never expected what I had to face today.

I was informed last friday that I had to give a presentation in front of like 6 professors about what I've been doing in the lab...though I just joined the lab 3 months ago!!! Yah tell me about it. I was freaked outta my mind. This weekend all I did was go to bed and wake up thinking about the presentation. Finally I made the presentation on sunday and today I got to lab and worked my butt off practicing till around 2ish. One of the grad students I work with, came in and said my graph was all wrong. Gheesssh....it was 10 mins before the presentation. I had to take it solo...so I threw the presentation out the door.

Walked into the room with the 6 professors. We sat on a long table...and there were about 5 other grad students there. We were each asked to talk about what we did. They asked me questions, and thankfully my advisor was nice enough to help me out..and I was able to answer my questions. Man..I was soo nervous!!!! I ripped some skin off the side of my nail..yah bleeding finger in the meeting..not fun :(

Ohhhhh..so glad it's over now!!!!!

Oh point of post..yah why do I put myself through this stuff? I mean I like working in lab..like grad school. Hate having to take classes...when will they EVER stop. And this presentation shit...gheeesshhh....

If you're gonna sleep..get a frikkin room

So...I decided to venture out of the lab today and go to a seminar in biology totally not related to my research..hey it's nice to know other things than just what I study ya know.

At the seminar there were a ton of people there. Quite a few taking notes and listening..but when the speaker got past the 30 min mark...half of the people were sleeping. Pissed me off really. If you wanna sleep just get the hell outta the room, or don't come at all!!!

This also applies to loser students who think they can come to a class and then sleep throughout the class. As if what the teacher says will be magically written in your head while you doze off..gimme a break you freakos...

I hate it..hate it..hate it. I've never dozed off in a seminar or a class before nor will I ever. In fact I cant' even fall asleep sitting....the only time it really happened to me was when I was hugely jet lagged and hadn't slept for about 1.5 days and was waiting for my next plane to board..anyways a huge tangent. My point...please if you are sleepy..don't come..whether it be class or a seminar!!! Sleepers only make others sleeeeeepyyy...

World be crashing..

Came to lab today. Don't know what was up with me. Did the ritual of checking my e-mail, visiting a few websites, and then ran across the e-mail about the lab meeting. was wondering where all the lab members were, the office was quiet. Realized they were all at the lab meeting I was missing. If I would have gone I woulda walked in 30 mins late..couldn't do that. If I would have remembered the meeting, I could have made it to the meeting on time when I arrived to school.

So bummed. Lab isn't going well. I'm realizing how selfish and rude people are these days. Part of me wants to yell at them, but I know I have to work with these people for the next 5 years!! Maybe I'll take a day off from the lab...probably not.

:(

Greatest Show to START again!!!

Must announce to ALL who do not know..but Survivor will start tomorrow!!!!!!! On CBS!!!! I love this showwwwwww!!! Can't wait!!!

Bummed Part 3

Sister just e-mailed me. Said she was trying to get a hold of me, but I live in a secluded part of the damn building with no signal--so no way to get a hold of me on my cell. Heard some bad news...gave me chills :(

Found out that a classmate of mine died last september. My sister is friends with my classmate's older sister. I cannot believe this. I have to experience or hear of two deaths of my classmates in one year..more like a few months of each other. I'm still not over the death of 1st Lieuntenent M.Fasnacht who died June 8th :(

My Favorite Candies..

So..I was talking to a friend online..a professional photographer actually. And somehow the topic of candy came up, and I figured I"d write about my favorite candies.

I am generally into fruity candies, and sometimes I'll go for chocolate. I have to admit chocolate is filling a bit more than fruity, but it depends on the day and my urges..and in general they lead towards fruity. Although I've quit eating candies almost completely now.

Anyways, here's the list of the candies..in no order, and I'm sure I"ll add more to it soon again and again and again..

1. Gobstoppers
2. Strawburst
3. Sour Patch Kids
4. Jolly Ranchers (Watermelon specifically)
5. Runts
6. Laffy Taffy
7. Skittles
8. Nerds


when it comes to chocolate..I'm all about Hershey Kisses. I also like the chocolate plus white chocolate thingies..Hugs I think they are called--not sure. Man now I'm craving it!!! I used to be able to stand Butterfinger but now hate it because I ate it too much. I do like Twix and Kit Kat though..

Bummed Part 2

Yah yah...that's the thing. I'm bummed again. It's lab crap, and it's driving me up the wall. I feel as if there was a path I was walking on..someone told me to walk another path and share with another student. When I walked that path, the student hogged over since it was his path in the first place, and now I'm left standing. I can't go back to my path, as I need to work on the path with the student, but this student is possessive. I suppose I would be too. Nuff said...

Been tired today...walked quite a bit yesterday..and ran. Now feeling it :(

Bummed...

I'm bummed. My friend Annie from South Africa tells me not to do something and I still for some reason forget her advice and still do that thing. Gheesh am I stupid or what? Annie is a great friend from years back, and we share a few decades in our age..but she's awesome! She's a fashion designer, and actually visited Minnesota to see the Mall of America!! Too bad I didn't know her well enough then..otherwise we could have met!!!!!!!!

Anyways..so Yah I'm bummed. Sorta wish I could turn back time, and keep my damn mouth shut..she tells me to blah blah blah, and I do da da da...yah retarded me.

I don't feel like posting again..but yah another topic...ABout undergrads again. I decided to go somewhere ELSE in the bio building today..was getting sick of my lab..so went to the main floor to write e-mails and blog..some undergrad walks in..."did I see you here on monday"..umm no, I rarely get my ass up here..OK..then there goes the blah blah conversation. Hello I have 20 mins to spare before I run up to lab again to my experiment and you wont even let me write my frikkin e-mail or post!!! Yah the kid needed advice...does my forehead say "counselor" on it?? I didn't even know this kid! ANyways, I was nice about it..couldn't imagine getting pissy on someone I don't know (that does not include brother or sister!!)...yah it turned out he wanted me to tell him what to do for the next 2 hours..either study for his GRE or waste time...and honestly it felt like he was hoping to waste it by blabbing away with me...I grabbed my keys and towards the end of our brilliant I am all that conversation..I told him to study for his GRE...and to set his eyes high on schools he thinks he won't get into...but still are worth a shot.

The things my friends do. My friend Tom Heagy whom I've known for yearsssss...is one crazy creature. He sells and raises Gecko's (did I spell that right?). He also sells their food and stuff. I wanted a pic of him holding silk worms and stuff but he didn't have one. He also has roaches and stuff, but didn't feel like touching them. Anyways he gave me a Gecko pic with his hand...so here is it. Interesting I know. I'd never touch such a thing. I'm a biologist but I like em small like bacteria or viruses.

His company's name is "Midwest Herpetoculture Suppy". I'd put the link of the company's website up, but he says it's being updated. For anyone interested in buying Gecko's...gimme a msg and I'll refer you to this unique individual.
Anostica

Smells...bad and gooooood

Okay I'm a smelly stuff nazi. I love buying perfume, smelly lotions, smelly handwashes, body washes, you name it...I've got about 5 of them, or at least a 6 month supply of them. I'm more into soft flowery smells than am I into fruity smells. And as dorky as it sounds I like smells which smell like Tea, or cigarette smoke..yah I'm crazy, get used to it (prime examples--Happy by Clinique, or LaCoste). Anyways, totally not the point of this post; thoughs smells are gooooooooooooooooooooood.

Point of post; how smells are bad and yes good as well. That's when you attribute smells to memories. It's hard when you smell something and all the memories come back. I remember learning in my psychology class that if you studied with some perfume on, you'd be more likely to remember stuff on the exam if you wore the same perfume. So ya...the other day I was over at a friend's house...total distinct smell in the house...was overwhelming. Brought back quite a few memories....good but yet at the same time bad. I wasn't expecting to smell and remember and just the smell made me want to avoid the room, and walk away..which I ended up doing after 2 hours of being there. Like I said the smell was overwhelming and was getting to me.

So moral of story. There isn't one. BUT...yes smells are GREAT. I'm crazy about smelly stuff..and no it's not a fart or something (I know my bro will comment and say it, so I'll post it now). But smells are great, but you get memories from them..and it's awesome to remember good ones..but bad to remember the bad ones. Okay I'm done..

The worst experience..

I didn't know if I should cry or what..but I certainly wasn't going to laugh today of what I saw. All I could do was hold my breath and clench my teeth and watch.

I had to go to a seminar specifically for people in my research area. The seminar is also conducted in conjuntion with a class. This class consists of people in my area, who are going to be finishing their PhD this year or very very soon. My advisor expects most of his grad students to attend. And his colleague is responsible for the class and grades the presentation from PhD students who will be graduating. There are also a lot of invited speakers for the talk.

Today before the seminar, the colleague talks about what he expects out of the seminars being given and the presentations from the graduating phd students. I figured great, he has great ideas and I hope people do listen to him. He then proceeded to introduce someone from his lab. The guy gave the talk..but it was soo short. I mean it was like 22 mins or 25 mins, when the seminar should be about 50 mins. The teachers/colleague of the class got up, and he's like, WELL since this person did not use the whole time..we will hold questions for him for later..and I will discuss exactly what he did wrong. This man/colleague went through each slide one by one..literally and talked of what was wrong with each slide--pointing all over the frikkin place.

I was soo dissappointed to see it. I saw so many people laugh..I mean the room was loaded with about 55 people..lots of them were laughing. What the hell? A guy was being humiliated! I just was dazed..and the colleague kept going on and on..I tried to talk myself into it figuring that, that's what advisors do..to make you better. What the colleague brought up were great points..but I do not believe it was the time or place to do it..at all!

The thing which disappointed me the most was that I thought the guy presenting was a grad student like the rest of us..but he was actually a post-doc...and it made me more mad that this colleague could treat someone like that..oh hell it figures...just left a huge lasting impression on me....Been talking about it since it happened today :(

I had to meet an idiot!

Yah so something else pisses me off. Quit complaining; this blog isn't much of my philosophical thoughts as it used to be..but put up with it anyways if you care!

I won't go into detail much..but here goes, as I'm scared this might give away too much info. But...a friend of mine invited someone for dinner. I was there listening, and they know what type of person I am. How else can I say this..if your ancestory is german, people think you're german. K..so I'm something alright. Knowing this, the bullshited butthole has the energy to sit there and talk about the type of people I come from..saying they are hotheaded and idiots. I cut in once, and said hey I'm one of those..that didn't stop him. My friend tried to stop asshola..but he didn't care. He kept talking. I guess I am not too confrontational, but I also don't know much about my "so called people" to talk..so I let it go. But...gheesh get some brains dork! I kept telling myself..it's nothing, come on..you know better..only the uneducated dorkos talk like that.

People need to learn some respect. I admit, I'm stereotypical too..I won't lie. We all are. But you know, the only people that hear of my stereotypes are probably my closest of close friends which are a few..or my family. Other than that, I tell no one...it's not something to flaunt...at most it should be something to get rid of...Guess idiot that I met tonight didn't know that.